Ruthie: It really depends on the occasion. I wouldn’t request to bring somebody to someone’s award ceremony, to a funeral, or a wedding. You just have to suss it out and be very modest about it. I suppose you just say, “Would it be okay? If not, it’s fine.”
Brooklyn: I don’t really like going to places without my wife—I’m kind of an awkward person in public! She’s my other half. I don’t think it’s bad to ask if you could have a plus-one—it’s totally fine to ask.
The concept of never showing up empty-handed—outdated or mandatory?
Ruthie: I like arriving with something, but if I’m rushing and I don’t, I think that’s okay too. We should just all not expect to be given something—a hostess gift is a very nice thing to receive, but I would definitely not say mandatory.
Brooklyn: It’s nice to show up with something, but it doesn’t have to be something expensive at all. For example, my friend’s having dinner tonight, and I’m bringing his favorite tequila—I think it’s always nice to bring a little something.
If one is on Ozempic and has no appetite, how should they conduct themselves at a dinner party?
Ruthie: I see this a lot, but people are pretty subtle about it—they’ll eat, but they don’t finish it. They put it to the side. They have complimentary things to say about the food. They eat slowly so they still keep up with everyone—and usually, the conversation is so strong that you do not even notice!
Should one always adhere to a dress code—even a themed dress code?
Ruthie: If you’re asked to a party that says everybody should wear something red. Well, why wouldn’t you? I would never wear something I didn’t want to wear, but I’d be quite relaxed if I was asked.
Brooklyn: If you get invited to something and it clearly states a theme, you have to wear the theme—you have to obey it. Me and my wife, when we go out somewhere, we love dressing the same—whether we wear the same color or go out matching.
How late is it too late to show up to a party?
Ruthie: I think if it’s a dinner party, you should show up when the guest invites you, you know? Why keep people waiting, wondering where you are?
Brooklyn: 5, 10, 15 minutes late is fine—if there’s traffic. Being really late? I don’t think that’s the greatest look.
Can one ever rearrange the seating chat without the hosts’ consent?
Ruthie: I wouldn’t do that, no; it’s just two hours of your life and then you could always move around later!
Brooklyn: Absolutely not. That is a big one. Absolutely not.
Are there any off-limit topics of conversation? What are they?
Ruthie: I don’t have any off-limit topics. I love politics, issues, and people’s experiences. But talking about someone in a negative way is not great. If somebody starts saying something about somebody else that’s negative, that doesn’t interest me very much.
Brooklyn: Talking about depressing stuff.