You’ve just received a stunning gift box adorned with a white silk bow. The logo on the box is unmistakable with its prominent white block letters. As you eagerly open the box, you discover exactly what you’ve been yearning for. The leather is smooth and velvety to the touch, and its fragrance is absolutely divine. It’s a timeless black Chanel purse. Suddenly, you feel an unprecedented surge of arousal, because nothing excites you more than opulence and wealth.
Let’s delve into the world of money kinks. According to sociologist Sarah Melancon, Ph.D, a clinical sexologist and lead researcher at Womens-Health.com, when we talk about “money kinks,” we’re not literally referring to sexual arousal from paper money itself. It’s more about being turned on by what money symbolizes in our capitalist society: power, status, luxury, and an often unattainable lifestyle.
For instance, if you find yourself sexually aroused by having stacks of hundred-dollar bills showered upon you in bed at a high-end hotel, it’s unlikely the tactile sensation and distinctive scent of the money that’s making you aroused; it’s what the money represents.
Naturally, the concept of a money kink raises a question similar to the one often asked about “praise kinks,” which have gained recent media attention. Curious writers (including myself) have wanted to know: Do you have a praise kink, or do you simply enjoy compliments? Similarly, we might ask: Do you have a money/luxury kink, or do you simply have a taste for finer things?
Let’s explore this further. We’ll break down what a money kink entails, how to determine if you have one, and discuss some ways to explore it without breaking the bank—for those of us who don’t have a sugar daddy (or sugar mama) to fund our expensive sexual desires.
What is a money kink?
The real question is: Can you genuinely experience sexual arousal from expensive things, luxury, and money? Well, the answer is a resounding yes. The distinction between being turned on by money and merely enjoying nice things is quite clear. If you have a money kink, money and luxury genuinely arouse you sexually. On the other hand, if you simply enjoy nice things, you derive great pleasure from them but don’t experience sexual arousal. Mistress Kye, a professional kinkster and BDSM expert, explains that she has encountered numerous instances of money kinks in her work throughout the years. She states, “We’re easily seduced by money even with minimal encouragement. The seductive appeal of money in a capitalist society makes it ripe for fetishization.” Clearly, this kink thrives under capitalism. Though this reality highlights a range of problematic societal structures and injustices that we don’t have time to address here, it doesn’t diminish the authenticity or validity of the kink itself.
Why are people aroused by money?
Again, the allure likely doesn’t stem from the physicality of dollar bills. Of course, it’s possible that you’re genuinely aroused by the smell and feel of money—no judgment here, my friends. Yet, even in that case, any attraction to the green stuff is likely connected to the power and privilege money signifies. Whatever sensory response you may have to the cash essentially registers in the brain as follows: “This smell/sight/feeling = money, and money = power.” And just like that, you’re feeling incredibly aroused.
Furthermore, a money kink is rooted in classic Dom/sub power dynamics. Hence, the reasons someone may be aroused by money are similar to the reasons people are turned on by other kinks. Kye explains, “Like all kinks and fetishes, money can trigger the release of feel-good hormones in the brain that kinksters seek—endorphins, dopamine, and adrenaline—just like the luxury items we’re attracted to that money can buy.”
Additionally, having money can signify the ability to provide or acquire a particular lifestyle, which can be sexually arousing for some individuals. Kink educator Emerson Karsh explains, “Wealth can indicate characteristics such as dominance, intellect, and connectedness, which can also arouse people. Additionally, the comfort and caring symbolized through being treated to expensive things, luxury, and money can be sexually stimulating.”
Money kinks and ‘findom’
If you’re familiar with the world of findom—financial domination, which involves being aroused by giving money and/or assets to a professional Dom—you may wonder how this fits into the concept of money kinks. The short answer is that they certainly relate to each other. While a money kink can exist independently of financial domination, there is a connection. The common thread is the exchange of money (and thus power), whether one derives pleasure from giving it away or accumulating it, according to Melancon. Karsh adds, “Making a tribute within financial domination is a form of relinquishing power; therefore, it is related to money kinks due to the power exchange. The idea of financially treating and caring for someone may also be present in both financial domination and money kinks.”
In summary, findom and money kinks both involve money and power exchange, but they don’t always go hand in hand. You can certainly have a money kink without being interested in financially dominating a partner.
Is it normal to be aroused by money?
As Karsh highlights, what’s considered “normal” is entirely subjective, especially when it comes to sex. However, having a money kink is completely normal. There is no right or wrong way to enjoy kinks, and there is no right or wrong way to be aroused, as long as all parties involved are consenting adults who are fully informed and aware of the arrangement.
“Money represents power and the exchange of power,” says Karsh. And guess what? “Power dynamics are one of the most common kinks, sexual interests, and desires.”
Think about it—so many kinks, fetishes, and turn-ons ultimately stem from power exchanges, whether it’s BDSM, breeding kinks, age gaps, or various forms of role play. Money kinks are just one manifestation of the attraction to playing with power dynamics.
What does a money kink look like?
Curious about what a money kink actually entails? Melancon provides some common examples:
Feeling aroused by wearing or owning expensive items, such as fancy high-heels/shoes, handbags, jewelry, clothes, etc.
Desiring a partner to spend substantial amounts of money on you or wanting to splurge on a partner with significant financial investments (not just for a night out, but hundreds or even thousands of dollars).
Longing to be “forced” to give money, resources, or expensive gifts to a partner or dominatrix (also known as Findom).
It’s important to clarify how you personally experience your money kink. Everyone has different ideas of what a money kink looks like and how they want to explore it. Before engaging in real-life experiences, take time to contemplate your fantasies and identify specific scenarios that arouse you.
How to explore a money kink without breaking the bank
Now, you may have a money kink, but perhaps you or your partner(s) lack the financial resources. After all, most of us don’t have unlimited funds to spend on spa days, shoes, and vacations solely for the purpose of getting aroused. As with most kinks (and sex in general), there are inherent risks associated with engaging in a money kink, which is why establishing and respecting healthy boundaries is crucial, according to Melancon. So, how can you satisfy this turn-on in a way that doesn’t drain your bank account? We have some expert-approved suggestions for you:
Incorporate shopping into your fantasies rather than indulging in real-life spending sprees. Instead of actually purchasing items, pretend to shop online—adding items to your cart while masturbating or engaging in sexual activities with a partner. This way, you can experience arousal without facing a hefty credit card bill later on.
Opt for more affordable options. Instead of buying a genuine Chanel purse, consider purchasing a knock-off. If possible, obtain an authentic Chanel box to package the knock-off, making the experience even more immersive and exciting.